


Time To Kill

by nicolai



Category: Rick and Morty
Genre: Alcohol, Blow Jobs, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, Incest, M/M, Masturbation, kink discussion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-14
Updated: 2017-09-14
Packaged: 2018-12-29 22:42:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12095019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nicolai/pseuds/nicolai
Summary: Rick and Morty are stuck in the ship for a few hours and looking for things to talk about and do to pass the time.





	Time To Kill

“Soo…. Ask me a question, Morty!” Rick exclaimed, lounging backward over the seat of his flying saucer, legs in the air, and flask in hand; 

They were waiting for sun up to try to fly home because the patches he’d used to repair the broken battery were powered only by light. With a few more hours to kill, Rick had decided to focus on his grandson, mostly because he was running out of booze and getting bored. 

“Aw, geez, what kind- what kind of question, Rick?” Morty rubbed the back of his neck and bit his lip; they’d been stuck there for a while and he was getting a little anxious, not least of which because unbidden thoughts of Jessica kept coming to mind and making him wish he wore looser pants. 

“I dunno, Morty,” Rick shrugged, “Just something. Let’s talk, Morty. Ask anything you want.”

“Umm…” Morty hedged, “Uh, when you were my age, um, did you mas-masturbate?” he imagined that the answer was yes, but he wanted to know if he was weird for thinking about it so often or for how he did it or anything. 

Rick laughed, “Morty, god, Morty, out of everything you could have asked, everything in the whole world, Morty, that’s what you want to know?” he felt like he’d dodged a bullet with Morty deciding not to ask about anything really personal that he’d care to share, “Yeah, all the time. And when I was older. And now. People masturbate all the time, Morty. It’s normal. And healthy.”

“It- it is?” Morty cracked a tight smile, “Oh geez. Really all the time, Rick? Like, thinking about it?”

“Yeah, Morty,” Rick burped, “Any time I’m not thinking about science, I’m thinking about my dick, and that’s normal, Morty. I mean, I’m not normal, I’m the smartest guy in the universe, and what I think about isn’t normal, I guess, maybe, but thinking about it at all? Yeah, that’s normal. That’s just everyone, Morty. They tell you that it’s guys, but it’s everyone.”

“Wow, really?” Morty looked at his grandfather, “Do you think Jessica ever…? Oh geez, I really shouldn’t be thinking about that…” he blushed furiously and put his hands over the front of his pants. 

“Yeah,” Rick burped, “I’m sure she does, Morty. I’m sure she does. Hell, if it’s night there, she might be right now. Just, you know Morty, rubbing her clit or using an electric -eeerrrrrrp- toothbrush.”

“An electric toothbrush?” Morty asked, momentarily distracted from his arousal. 

“They vibrate, Morty,” Rick rolled his eyes, “You’re so fucking stupid. You ever felt something vibrate on your dick, Morty? Did the sex robot have that? It’s amazing. And it’s like that for clits too.” 

“Oh wow,” Morty closed his eyes, imagining Jessica lying in bed, her legs spread and an electric toothbrush between them, “Wait, you’ve used an electric toothbrush on your dick?”

Rick laughed, “Morty, I’m a scientist. I invent things for fun. Do you really think I’d have to make do with something like that? No, if I want something that vibrates, I’ll make something good. For god’s sake, Morty.”

“Well, what things have you- have you used, Rick?” he was now intensely curious about the idea. 

“Ah, Morty, what haven’t I? I’m old, Morty, been around a long time, I’ve done a lot of things,” Rick chuckled, “Stuff you couldn’t even imagine, Morty.”

“Have you, like, put things,” Morty blushed, “Oh geez, um, in your bu-butt? Like, for fun? Not smuggling?”

Rick threw back his head and laughed, “Of course, Morty. Like, duh. That’s so, like, that’s like you just asked me if I ever had cereal for breakfast, Morty. Of course I like getting fucked in the ass. Big things, small things, things that move, things that vibrate, things that stretch, things that spin, things that inflate, things that do things we don’t even have words for in our languages. I’ve put a lot of things up there, Morty.”

“Wow,” Morty tried to imagine how that would feel; he angled slightly away from Rick’s line of sight and pushed his hand down the front of his pants, “Does that hurt though?”

“Only when I want it to, Morty,” Rick burped, “You just use lube and go slow. It doesn’t hurt for no reason, Morty.”

“Oh geez, why-why-why would you want it to h-hurt, Rick?” Morty was trying to be discrete but couldn’t keep his voice even. 

He laughed, “Because it’s -eerrrrrrpp- fun. I get bored, Morty. Everything gets boring,” Rick turned his face to toward his grandson, smirking, “Oh my god, Morty. You’re masturbating, Morty? In my ship?” 

“Oh, god, Rick, I- I- I can’t help it, I’m sorry!” Morty stopped, covering his face in his hands. 

“Oh, Morty, hey, it’s okay. I don’t care. Here, let me help,” Rick reached over and unbuttoned Morty’s pants. 

Morty froze, looking down at his grandfather’s hands. He had no idea what to say to this, so he didn’t say anything. He felt like he should have an objection, but he didn’t seem to. He felt relieved that it was okay and some happy anticipation about someone else touching him. That was his grandfather and he thought that might make it wrong, but underneath his anxiety, if there was one thing that his adventures with Rick had taught him, it was that common opinions on what was right or wrong and what mattered at all were all wrong. There were millions of Ricks and millions of Mortys, surely some of them had done everything, including have sex. And he was curious as to what Rick could teach him about this. 

Rick could tell that Morty was trying to make up his mind about what he should do, but he didn’t seem to want to say no, so he continued with what he was doing. He pulled Morty’s penis free from his clothes and squeezed it gently. Over the years, he’d been with a lot of people, and seen a lot of different dicks, and Morty’s was, well, unremarkable. He was still growing, the proportions reflected that, and it was totally average. But it was Morty’s and that made it more interesting and appealing. Morty was shuddering under his fingers and clutching at the seat; he’d forgotten how sensitive young people often were. 

“Say Morty, ever got a blow job before? From a person, not the robot?” Rick asked, twisting around in his seat to be able to reach Morty better. 

“N-no, Rick,” Morty mumbled, eyes wide in overwhelming anticipation. 

“Alright, let me show you -eeeerrrrrrp- what that’s like, Morty,” Rick said before burying his face in his grandson’s lap. 

Oral control wasn’t a strong suit of Rick’s especially not when he’d been drinking actively as opposed to the passive consumption that kept him going through the day, but he was enthusiastic and enjoying what he was doing, and Morty didn’t have a frame for comparison anyway. He licked and sucked in equal measure and after a minute or two was rewarded with Morty cumming in his mouth. Rick pulled back and spat into a napkin that he grabbed from the floor then took a swig from his flask. He sat up and looked at Morty. 

“So?” Rick prompted. 

“That was amazing. Was that o-okay though?” Morty responded, looking hopeful for reassurance. 

“Of course it was, Morty. It was great! You came, I had fun, we used up another minute -eeerrrrrrp- or two. All good things, Morty,” Rick nodded. 

“But, um, wouldn’t my parents have a problem with it?” he hedged, tucking himself back into his pants; he didn’t tell them about what went on a lot of the time anyway, but he was still concerned.

“Probably, but they’re stupid. Especially Jerry,” Rick shrugged, “Morty, the incest taboo, look, it’s not a real thing. It’s just because genetic diversity is good for the species, right? But people take it too far. Diversity isn’t all that important, and also, we can’t reproduce, Morty. We can’t reproduce. If I was going to make you pregnant, then maybe I could see a problem. But this is just fun. There’s nothing wrong with it,” he explained; Rick mostly believed himself, he did have some concern that having such a codependent relationship with Morty might not be best for the both of them, and if they started having sex on the regular, that might increase that, but the sex itself was certainly fine. 

“So, we just won’t tell them,” Morty nodded, “Grandpa Rick?” his tone was delicately optimistic and uncertain.

“What, Morty?” Rick settled back into his chair, considering taking a nap until they could leave; he hadn’t counted on so much adolescent insecurity, but Mortys were easy enough to soothe. 

“I really liked that. Can we do mo-m-more sometime?” Morty asked, blushing at the thought already; he’d started imagining what it might be like to try some inventions Rick could make for that or maybe try blowing Rick instead, or even having him inside him, although he was still concerned that it might hurt a little. 

“I want that too, Morty. Sounds good,” Rick concluded the conversation by closing his eyes to go to sleep, “Wake me at sunrise. Should be in an hour or so.”


End file.
